Due to the cancellation of the Inaugural Ball for Senator
Kerry . . . There will be a small Soiree' (pity party) for those who
have already bought their attire.

The night's entertainment will be provided by the DIXIE CHICKS & Bruce
Springsteen. Tissues for excessive self pity will be furnished by Susan
Sarandon and Tim Robbins

We are pleased to announce DAN RATHER will be our Master of ceremonies
! ! ! Yeah ! ! ! !

Cameron Diaz has pledged CUPCAKES ! ! What's this . . . a Free
Screening of Fahrenheit 911! Thank you, Michael Moore. Ashton Kutcher
will sign his latest book..."I open my mouth . . . and stupid falls out"


P. Diddy will not be in attendance. He is still trying to get the
vote out. If you see him tell him that he was not disenfranchised" from
this event. He can come home now.

Barbara Streisand is preparing for her next role and will not be
here; (boo hoo) she will be starring as Teresa Heinz Kerry in the sad
story of "Shove it" . . . Just in.....Grapes will be provided by the
Heinz Corporation....Sorry, only SOUR available.

The Reverend Jesse Jackson will be cooking on the BBQ and John Kerry
will be flipping the burgers... something he has proven to be very good
at. Lots of Ketchup, folks; the white house has donated thousands of
bottles, relish, mustard, and all the pickles too. When asked why the
generosity? The spokesman for the Bush Household told us.....We have
switched to DelMonte, thank you very much.

Attention all actors: Norman Lear is casting for his new television
show -"Fahrenheit 11-2-04 How'd the GOP Do That?"

I Hope to see you all there...not much else going on.

HILLARY

Definitely no interest here... I thought all of those people were supposed to leave the country anyway.

I'll go if there are going to be watercraft there and a poker run.